for like the 1st time in the past few mths, i had some sort of an adrenaline rush when i saw this cute chindian guy... jz too bad, he is the bus driver. haha. n i need a-maths tuition. haha... i thnk mite ask the brother. when he is at home. and when i do get to see him. he is sooo in love... which is so sweet... hopefully this time arnd he is serious... afterall, i still believe that players do change.elvin ng is 1. 4 yrs with christina. wow. n talkin abt qin kun, alwin is seriously A sotong still.... haha... idiot asked me whether i was married... do i even look married.... jeez. sotong sotong. n hopefully we getta meet. ravin is in love? tt i dunno.. bt its the season ar...


arnd feb, all will get attached then arnd august to october, most will break up... haha... love is in the air... keke. maths just sucks. haiz. need tuition like badly. hmm calmaeth nightmare again. the so nt user friendly maths assignment portal... a revival of the stats nightmare. oh n the parents are seriously so in love or sumthng... no arguments or quarrels the past few mths. nice. peace at last. and they are taking several trips to msia in dec itself. wow. oh and soin roshni kaur, ms singapore world. another broadrician. a classmate... 2 broadricians in the media. now who said broadrick sucks? we do have our share of media light. wait till i tell ravin abt this... bt no surprise... she is very gd looking and tall... n she can talk.. sooo yeap. its been 5 yrs man. damn fast. i miss being a teenager. n i miss my class full of guys.

nth beats hanging out with a grp of guys... jz lepak-in, get some drinks. talking, laughing... haha... i miss talkin with bj. and bryan. walking home with yin sen. getting phone calls frm ravin tellin me abt this and tt. n deepti callin me to check wts my answer for this and tt q. ah ma making fun of the pictures during history class. vallen galloring us with her artpieces and the sex talks. and franky leanin over and askin me answers durin chem class. elvin ng's teasing. being taunted by kamal,muz and ahmad as a tomboy. ravin disturbing deepti. haha... nth beats that. and nth can give us back those days. nth bt memories.

sadly or happily, no THE talk. nth at all. heh. sch is boring. no cute guys or wtsoever. gossip girl is damn nice to watch. i thnk i have a fetish for deep voices. jz gets me excited. especially those that speak in proper english with no singlish. wow. it just blows my mind.random happens to be my middle middle name. n when u have nth to talk abt, u end the post. cheerioz! oh, 2 more days to dec. happiness...=)

ola

friday was nightmare... he juz went on and on for 3 hrs without a damn break. damn shit. i uds shit frm functions.knew i was gonna hate calculus.saturday was great. met them at 1+.. had lunch.. walked to esplanade to gt the tix. then watched the play. which was spectacular and hey i realized my tamil isnt tt bad. i cld uds it. after which, we went to arab st where i saw tt engineerin guy sied... which kinda unnerved me... wah lau... why do i keep on bumpin in2 sum1 i noe evrywhere? hung out there for an hr... then he was gonna drive us back home... was near hse when i told them i dont feel like goin home, usha was gonna meet prithip..


so we decided to catch om shanti om or some movie. went to orchard, dropped usha off. headed to the pines for their friend's daughter's 1st bday party. after which, headed to sengkang to magesh annae's bestie's place for some post diwali gathering. met karpagam akka, devi periyamma and segar periyappa. see, once again world too small.. hung out there.... talk talk... then after which arnd 11, headed to tm to catch om shanti om where i bumped into robin. then the movie.... 3 hrs... haha... it was okie... nth spectacular... the best thng was the main song 'om shanti om'. the video had practically almost evry1 in bollywood with the exception of the big b and family.came home arnd 3.30. n yeah... great day... how i wish evry sat was like tt.... haha, most prob, i will gt THE talk frm the parents. im sure i have sumthng for yest. seriously, cant be bothered ar... i loved it.... aitez, outz

and its friday. the last wk of november is approachin. err i feel guilty for laughin at nadia. they were playing burnout on ps2 during lunch. yes i like the game. bt i rather learn how to play after knowing the control. n i rather play it on the psp.. i know we have tt game... nadia has apparently no sense of direction... she went head into the wall and when she had to turn, she wont really start till starting to scrape on the wall... it was hilarious to me la... coz she has her driving license... burnout is abt speeding and banging into the cars... and she didnt do either... and she kept on goin head onto the walls and pillars... it was hilarious to me n yati... n i told her no way will i gt in2 the car if she is drivin. haha...

still cant find the bag nor shoes... sian. am i too fussy or wt? hmm syamz bday party... wanna go bt none of the girls are goin... soooo still considering... its all the guys... haha... nanti, im the only girl amongst the group of all guys.. keke... weird how it didnt matter b4... n now i feel awkward... haha. oh well.. i changed. period. outz

boring... singapore is really too small... monica knows shabana whom is a primary sch friend. aiman knows eka. wth.... all my friends interlinked here and there. dunno who else is gonna come out next... its a path of discovery evryday.... hehe. i thnk i know basically alot of ppl based in the east. keke...

okie... updates... hurt my feet... gt no idea wt i did... was limping for 2 days... seems alright today.... gonna go out later with the cuzzies. helped out with the bks in the lib. fnt chatted with seyed for 2 wks? yeah. calculus seems alright... bt boring. december is in 8 days time. chipmunks movie is coming out. ravin is comin home soon... hopefully... usha is gonna go off soon... haiz... nvm... gd moments. talked with mzan last nyt.... talking abt this n tt... like old days... need to meet up with him. ana too. sidah too. 2008 is sooo near... can envision all the boys ording soon. sooo bloody fast sia... 2 yrs since graduation frm tp. nxt yr, another yr older... *gasps* keke. oh spooky thing, sayedah called me this morn n told me im in the same carriage as her though i was on the bus... haha... when i told her, she was like okie there is a girl here who looks exactly like u... mysterious lookalike. heh. i wonder, will i getta meet her. oh yeah need to meet up with tt sayedah too. n sec sch folks. ages ages. yeah tt be all... cheerz.

my younger sister claims im acquiring pretty weird habits. okie, perhaps im listening to some old songs so wt? she claims i have lost my childish approach. hmm... have i? i doubt so. i just disconnect myself frm such activities. somehow i can sense i have changed. more even tempered. usual things tt will make me flare,im handling it with patience. a sudden or rather eccentric thought of heading to india. jz to my ancestor's hometown. no idea why. voiced it to my dad and he told me, okie, take leave... u want, u go dn... after which logical thnkin hit me, priorities are studies and driving. and perth. told him, after the degree perhaps. even lost my ability to curl up with a gd book. its been ages since i read. how time used to fly, curled up on the sofa, twirling my hair in my finger and just visualizing the story. reality came to a standstill and seriously i would not know what happens in my surronding. now, my attention span is pretty short... cant seem to read nethng without falling asleep. tt includes the notes. heh. i guess its jz too boring? the only thng still left is the ability to talk and talk, dance newhere n netime, sing and hang out with friends n of coz the beloved music. wldnt noe how i wld survive without music and dancing.

goin onto yr 2.this being the last yr 1 module. how time has flown. end of d yr is jz arnd the corner. 2nd last wk of november b4 december beckons u. can sense the xmas spirit with decorations and such being put up. the thing i look forward to is ravin comin back, hangin out with neha,def hangin out with deepti and of coz, our special get together. i thnk its time i contact all those old mates whom have drifted apart due to the different schools and new friends. n yes im looking forward to the end of 2007. why? brings me closer to perth. perth excites me. a new enviroment, new friends, new school.... thus i hope the yr 2008 speeds along as fast as 2007 ran along. n hopefully i find sumthng interestin in this job coz boredom is hittin me full force and its becomin a drag to head to work.it shld. afterall, i will have actual work to do nxt yr. if the cost and evrythng works out, gonna start planning everythng nxt yr. n then deciding when to quit. thank god, my parents support my decisions. they both agree it will do me some gd.n with this, i will end this literary essay. heh

went over to anusha's place yest. saw big aatha. hung out there talking. her brother joined in the conversation and wow, i realize he is such a big tamil movie buff which is like mega cool. tts the 1st time i have spoken to him n yes singapore is too small.... ebi is a distant relative. wth. left arnd 7.45pm. aatha was like pretty hesitant abt it. she wanted ramu maama to send us back bt both of us told her its okie... walked to the interchange n realized tt we cldnt see 51 stand there so walked to blk 302. the 1st stop after the interchange which happens to be siva's blk i thnk. haha... wt an irony. n yes 51 reaches hougang central in less than 30 mins ar. mega fast ar. cool.

was talkin to usha and i realized im blessed with great friends. those who dont discourage me and encourage me and are like a pillar all the time. frm my cuzzies to relatives.heh. goin onto another bugging topic.


when u need to take a particular bus, it will bloody never come. and when you dont need it and need some other bus, that bus will be the only 1 u see ar. hmm... n nowadays i realize this... i see alot of ppl i noe on the streets. some sort of growin up? hmm another 1, when u go to a performance or play or even a movie, when u are seated in the middle, u will always end up arriving later than those seated in the aisles. the way of life? i thnk so.

n after a long time, im updating. i thnk after poly days and ritz, this is the 1st time i didnt blog for 4 days. well lets see, i believe i have blown the 1st exam. i thnk. had a memory block. well cant blame me... all the mechanism were memorized... nt much practise questions... so i aint surprised. and yes, the hols mood. cant blame me ar... having too much fun... u thnk i wanna sit dn n study. bt its okie... i wont be tt affected... n perhaps im too cocky bt my heart tells me i will gt a borderline pass.... its nt like i didnt put in the effort ar... i did... jz nt seriously... n i didnt put in much focus. if i do fail, well there is a 1st for evrythng.... sooo yeah... part and parcel of life.... will be the 1st subject i have failed since poly days.

other than exams, life is great. was lookin thru my friendster profile and i realized that my family and friends play an important part in my life... u can see it... the foto, the comments.. err watched yaadein yest... wasnt spectacular nor heartwarming like k3g or kal ho naa ho... bt its sweet... wld i do tt? nah... i guess in tt area, im a lil foolish coz if i listen to my parents and family, i cld have saved myself frm stress and heartpain bt hey im an independent soul who loves her freedom and isnt willing to give it up for ne1. lesson learnt. haha... err i miss the chinese poly mates... ppy, timo,ian,terry,ym...

suddenly i feel like talking to timo. dunno why. i miss hearing his views. though they were contradicting mine most of the time, it was interesting... haha, the only guy fren whom i have spoken abt religions and child rearing and parenthood. dont ask me why... it juz came out. while we were doin our project reports or chatting online or jz hangin out in sch waiting for the next lessons. haha. oh well. enough talkin boring nonsense. outz!

ola...halfway thru nucleophillic aromatic substitution. this concludes the synthetic chem and onto the organometallics which is easy since its jz revision till catalysis. wanna take the day off on wed n thurs so tt i can do some last min muggin... look thru the notes n make sure im 100% sure of the notes. aitez. onto the main entry...

supposedly divorce rates have went up in singapore... frm 3 in a 1000 marriages in the 1980s i thnk to 8 in a 1000 marriages currently... seriously still seems like a small amnt. haha... n its weird to me since aint most marriages nowadays based on love... we rnt matchmade like before. we meet the person in school or work or thru some common friends, getta noe 1 another, fall in love, are in courtship for some years... for some, this might last up to 10 yrs... then decide to walk down the aisle... so why the breakdown? heard this show on 968fm. apparently they claim that once couples go into marriage, expectations increase and thus due to the lack of compromising in couple, marriage tends to breakdown.


a man whom is apparently still awaiting the divorce claims women have lost the tolerating ability. a woman claims that nowadays men are atrocious and stray out of marriage. so whom is to blame? another counsellor states that equal education has lead to women being egoistic that they are earning too and that women are more than willing to upgrade themselves while men dont thus leading to a higher salary etc.


perhaps the higher education is the main cause of the increasing rate. back then, women were supposed to be toiling in the kitchen and their words were not given much regard. and for now, we are educated. we see the world equally like the guys and not through a kitchen window or a house window like before thus this leaping into the open world might lead us to pretty much stand up for our rights. men pretty much have not changed. there are still many mcps pretty much still alive n kicking. they want a woman to cook and clean and entertain them in the night. i dont think i have met many guys who like the idea of me speaking my mind. it even affects my parents so yeap. and the very sad thing abt these mcps is the fact that its something learnt most probably from their own mother. sad innit? so perhaps its true women are the main cause of enmity. n yes going back to the bible. it was due to eve that adam was punished by god too innit?


women losing their tolerating ability? nah, i thnk its bullshit... there are still those who tolerate all the shit due to love. for the kids. or else there wont be news of wife being abused etc etc ryt? nor will there be ppo's issued. they are tryin to make the marriage work there i thnk. if nt why ppo, just apply for a divorce. get it over and done with. why be with a guy who hits u? so yeap. interestin topic though. wonder wt is the govt gonna throw into curb this so called increasing divorce rates. haha... more counselling? haha... money for making the marriage work out for 10 yrs. media focus on couples whom have been together for 25 yrs? haha... n the best. a campaign with a corny name... perhaps.. happy marriage campaign? heh. n today i learnt there is such a thing known as pap convention. wt a day of enlightment. aitez outz.

lets see... friday was amara attai's place. yest was my place. afternoon had manshya baby over... she is soooo mega cute.... heh... have her recording of some nursery rhymes. will load it when i have the time n mood. then the rest came over for dinner minus sashan. bt nvm... gt closer to mohven.rajini akka n magesh annae came in late. so yeah hung out for awhile.tml supposed to be geetha's place bt i doubt we are goin. or rather im goin.left with venny periyamma hse alone for me.


have to study. thursday is the exam. maths 1040 timetable seems gd. break over xmas n ny. sat is normal 2 to 5 classes. alryt to cope with i guess... n its hello to the so nt user friendly calmaeth and hello to my vulgar vocab. i thnk. usha is goin end of jan. haiz. gonna miss her man. bt nvm... its jz a few mths or a yr max. i will be goin to perth newae. n im sure we can gt to meet like once a wk or mth at least. n when she comes dn here. heh. distance only matters to the mind, nt to the heart. she is still my sister. n the sister whom i wish was mine. heh.
aawwww.......keke. aitez outz... gonna mug.

my nephew. sashan jeremiah. heh. cutest thng for me now. hehe. he is a hyperactive boy who hates to sit dn quietly. thnk gotta do with the gemini thng. heh. yest was nice... surprised i had duit diwali since im workin n all... bt hey. im still a kid okie. haha. hmm didnt see manshya baby though. n damn im old. haha.. gt nephew oreadi sia... im an aunt. wth. n this magesh annae says i can gt married since i love babies as i was carryin this boy arnd the hse... cute wt... n nice wt babies. i love babies bt tt doesnt mean i am ready to have 1 on my own... too much work n responsibility. its jz the so called girly side kickin in. oh n check out feez's socks.

nice ryt... hehe... found it mega cute lor.b n lastly my fav fotos for yest.

this is of coz feez n me. heh. behind is my brother. notice the color difference. its our pun btw us. this is my brother bt we dont have the same color. evil bt we use tt line since young.

some of the cuzzies... from left: geetha, anita or rajini akka,usha,me n bani... she looks like amara attai.. perhaps its coz of the saree...dunno why those who are arnd our age like the idea of sarees. i only volunteered to tie for anita's wedding. coz of amara attai. tts all. heh n oh yeah mukhtar annae came over. i last saw him when i was 14 or 16. now im 21 n he is 26. keke. he taught us the many ways of entertainin ourselves with those sparklers n of coz they were dangerous ways too. outz.

heh. guess the love is there. or else i wont have gt wt i wanted yest. no qs asked. jz a okie come. heh. i love baking. the whiskin of em together... foldin in...mixing... pourin it all in n baking... nt like cookin... so troublesome, gotta cut, chop,grind,stir etc etc...so much work. heh. aitez outz.

shankaran is in love or is attached. heh.signs are soooo obvious. heh. the 18 yr old thng to gt attached. see tons of it yr in n out. haha. shiok to wake up damn late. then jz bum at home. never did it after i started workin. heh. hmm... i still fnt bought baju deepavali. muz go buy. like i gt so much time oso. a day more. well tml after work, hit tm i guess... shld have sumthng i can find gd. worse come to worse, after which go to pp or bugis. bt im damn sure i can gt sumthng in tm. n knowin me, i wont give a damn abt the price... like means muz have. oh well. outz.

chitty chitty bang bang jz rocked. the set was beautiful. the car was cool. the kids were damn gd. the dancers n the music. excellent. worth the moolah.... loved the songs which gt u tappin alng... rufi was laughin tons. i had a nice day yest.. cemetary was fun to me too... i know that sounds morbid. bt i had a nice time talkin to my brother and juz watchin ppl. yeah i noe.. of all the places, cemetary. saw how some graves or tombs were in derelict. some were well kept. n ryt next to grandpa's is this guy by the name of mahen whom apparently was frm ritz and interestingly he shares the same date of birth as my grandpa. haha. wherever i go, ritz carlton is there to haunt me. interestin.


and in the night, i just walked back home in the rain... ppl were running n gettin shelter... i walked in the rain.. cldnt be bothered... it was so nice to gt wet.the splattering of a rain drop on u... on ur face... ahhh... nth beats it... the lightnin in the sky. yeah i have a foolhardy wish to die. heh. and i seem to be gettin hooked to ride it by jay sean. heh. nice. n he is hawt. haiz. gimme a guy like tt and hey he will be my no 1 priority. heh.

morning... woke up at 5+ on a sunday morning... a 1st after some time. went to the cemetery to go visit my grandpa's tomb. miss him. bt too overcrowded. devi akka, kumar maamaa,rajini akka, mages annae,me,gaya,naviin n nevain,sham n pretti were all the grandkids there. n add on the adults. nearly 20 ppl. in 1 small area. so yeah. was there arnd 6.45am... washed his tomb... then yeah went with my uncle to his dad's tomb which oso makes him my grandpa. then went to rajini akka's uncle's tomb so makes it my uncle. nenek and granduncle. so yeah... n today the place was packed. so many ppl. some shit abt the 5th day or wt... still dont uds it... wont uds the concept la. its jz not logical to me. like as if other days, the offerings wont be accepted like tt.


saw some prayer thngie goin on... n sum idiots dancin... typical tamil ppl behavior. somethng abt a god for the cemetery or wt... another uncle said it is an evil spirit. entah. dont wish to analyse it too... interestin though... so many tamil ppl...n yeah, my family is the noisiest and the biggest la. n oh yeah assorted color. heh. nice to stare at. oh yeah.. i fnt studied yt... die. aitez outz.

idiot of brother poked me... idiot. jz coz i guessed his gf's name n told anita... alryt... done with the damned report. sian. cldnt do it to my satisfaction. so i aint tt happy with it. bt i dont have the time. still have the quiz to study for. procrastinatin coz i have tons of free time. haiz. hate it. i jz never learn. n the quiz is on monday ar.n i thnk i have done like a few slides. its chiongin frm sat to monday. sian. n i still want to bake more..=) oh n anita wants me,surin,geetha n shankaran to go clubbin with her. she wants usha too.. hehe. now how interestin is tt. nnnnn.... syamz n seyed, terima kasih for evrythng. kesian u 2 for standin my mood swings. sorrie la babe. my curse to be born as a girl.

heh. been hearin the kannai vittu kan song since last night. gettin too addicted to tt song... heard it when i went dn to tekka.. n sumhow it reminds me of this english song bt i cant seem to gt the bloody name ar. irritatin. ways the lyrics are nice.. n im gonna have it saved here so tt i can see it when i look thru all this. n yes with the exception of seyed and me and my cuzzins, no1 is gonna uds this. yes, its my trial of bein a tamil girl. i mean appreciatin the songs n movie la.. n nt bein critical of it. tryin my hardest ar. still cant stand the thnkin though. hehe.


kannai vittu kan imaigal vidai kettaal
kanngal nanaiyathaa?
ennai vittu un ninaive nee kettaal
ullam udaiyatho?

etho etho enthan
idhayathai ahluthiyathe
atho atho enthan
uyiraiyum koluthiyathe

entha oru inimaiyum
ennaku indru kandathilai
ennum enna piddivatham?
unnai vittu thaana thaani
pathai ondru ennagu illai
ennidathil en kobam?

pothumadi intha thollai
en manathu thaangavillai
ennum enna vin mounam

and its a repetition of these. the direct translation will be sumthng like this and my tamil isnt perfect ar. i fnt done all this shit for ages.


If the eye leaves the eyelids and ask it questions, wont the eye gt wet?

If u ask the memories of u frm me, wont my heart break?

Something has pressed my heart


and that something has burned my life


I have never seen any happiness in my life before you, so why this obstinacy?


I dont have a path without you so why this anger?


cant take this pain anymore, why this unnecessary silence?

and yeah... this is it.. tried my best. hehe.. nt so bad. my tamil is still there. aitez out.

1st nov... ooo n im amazed at my lack of discipline. the time taken to write this entry should be the time taken to clear the report. bt unfortunately the brain is dead. im having another major headache juz like yest n to make matters worse. somehow i started sneezing in the evening thus leadin to a flu like syndrome.. of all the time to be catchin 1, when i have a major report due tml... and looks like i have to cancel goin out tml evening the way its goin since im unable to finish it.

had a weird fone call today... dunno whom it is... bt its weird to have calls where ppl dont say a word... call and dont say a word wtever for? this is the 2nd time in a yr gt this type of a call. weird ppl. okie... i cant take it nemore... head is really hurtin a bitch. n the respi system is fucked. wtf. screwin me up when i have a fuckin major deadline to meet. cibaidelic luck. woot. and have i invented a new word or wt? =)